


Chugging Hot Coffee

by artikgato



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Kissing, M/M, Persona Secret Santa 2017, Spoilers, rated t for ryuji's potty mouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 15:23:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13126470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artikgato/pseuds/artikgato
Summary: He had no intention of telling Ryuji  - or anyone, for that matter - about how he had to turn himself over to the police. But there was no way he was letting himself get locked up without telling Ryuji how he felt about him. He owed it to the blonde as much as himself.





	Chugging Hot Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> My Persona secret santa fic for xek-xek on tumblr! I hope you like it!

It had all started with an explosion. The explosion of Masayoshi Shido’s cruise ship Palace, to be precise. 

Palaces were dangerous, and Shadows were dangerous - they all knew that. Akira knew that better than most of them did. The possibility of injury or death in the cognitive world was a constant threat, and Akira knew that, too. He just hadn’t been prepared for it. Watching Akechi lock himself in with his cognitive doppelganger and not being able to do anything about it had almost been too much, and although they were enemies, he still grieved the loss of the boy. But Goro Akechi  _ had _ been their enemy, and hadn’t been among them for as long as any of the others. This was different. Losing Ryuji was different. Watching Ryuji get engulfed by the explosion was entirely different, in a lot of ways that Akira couldn’t process right away. And he didn’t get the time, really, because nearly as soon as they returned to the real world, Ryuji came stumbling back to them, miraculously unharmed. 

It had still left him reeling, though. Yes, losing Ryuji was different - of  _ course _ losing Ryuji was different. Ryuji was his best friend, he’d been with him the longest, even longer than Morgana. Even without the Metaverse and Personas and them being Phantom Thieves, Akira was certain that his friendship with Ryuji would still be the strongest one he’d ever had in his life. And it wasn’t like the others weren’t his friends too but...Ryuji was different. Losing any of them would have hurt. Losing Ryuji was...unfathomable.

It wasn’t until later that night that Akira had his epiphany. Oh. He was in love with him. 

And he was utterly terrified to tell him. 

So, he didn’t. Things didn’t have to change just because Akira had realized he had feelings for Ryuji. They were still best friends, and confessing would be just about the worst idea imaginable, because there was no way that Ryuji - painfully straight Ryuji - would accept his feelings. The  _ best _ he could hope for would be a gentle rejection, and the worst would be an utter destruction of their friendship. So Akira resolved to just hold onto his feelings, until he left to go back home at the end of the school year, at the very least. 

All of his plans were derailed when Sae had told him he needed to turn himself over to the police in order to spare his friends. He’d just saved the entire world from a malevolent god, and _this_ was the result? 

“I just need a little more time,” he’d told her. He’d turn himself over first thing in the morning. Right now, there was something he needed to do, before he regretted it. Who knew how long he’d be in jail for? Being the leader of the notorious Phantom Thieves couldn’t possibly have a short sentence, even if he was still a minor, and with his previous charges…

 

>Can you meet me at Leblanc tonight?

>>Dude u know it’s xmas eve right?

>I need to talk to you.

>>K, I’ll b there soon.

 

He had no intention of telling Ryuji  - or anyone, for that matter - about how he had to turn himself over to the police. But there was no way he was letting himself get locked up without telling Ryuji how he felt about him. He owed it to the blonde as much as himself. 

“Hey, man. What’s so important that you called me out on Christmas Eve?” Ryuji called out, as he meandered through the front door and over to the bar and took a seat. Akira poured him a glass of juice before answering.

“I didn’t interrupt anything did I?” he asked, and Ryuji scoffed.

“Nah, man. Mom’s working tonight and it’s not like I’ve got a girlfriend or anything…” he sighed, scratching the back of his head. Akira nodded, then rounded the bar and motioned to one of the booths. They were alone - Sojiro had the cafe closed for the evening, and it was after hours anyway. “I was kinda hopin’ to get some sleep. Fighting God kinda wears a man out, y’know?”

“I wouldn’t have any idea about that,” Akira joked, rolling his eyes, as they sat down. Ryuji laughed. Akira stared down at the coffee he’d poured for himself, a pensive look on his face, before he decided to raise it to his lips, tilt his head back, and drink it down in one go. Ryuji laughed again.

“Dude, chugging coffee? What’s got you so worked up?” he asked, when Akira finally put the now empty coffee cup down on the table between them. 

“I have to tell you something very important,” he said, looking Ryuji straight in the eyes with courage that he honestly didn’t know he could possess. He was channeling his inner Joker, even though he thought he’d left that particular persona back in the Metaverse, along with all of his actual Personas. 

“K?” Ryuji asked, and he looked a little unnerved. “And you...didn’t want to gather the whole team?”

“No, this is just between us,” Akira explained. He took a deep breath. _Keep it simple. Don’t overexplain, just say it_. “I’m in love with you.”

“...” Ryuji stared at him, mouth slightly open. “Huh?”

“I’m in love with you, Ryuji,” Akira repeated. 

“...is this a joke, man? ‘Cause if you’re just teasing me, it's not very funny,” Ryuji replied, his voice starting to sound strained the more he talked. Akira shook his head.

“I’m not joking. I’m dead serious. So much happened today and I know we’re both exhausted, but I needed to tell you because...I needed you to know,” he said. They both fell silent, Akira fighting not to let his gaze fall to the table, and Ryuji starting to look more and more visibly panicked. Akira sighed. 

“It’s alright if you don’t feel the same,” he continued, biting his lip. “And you don’t have to try to force yourself to return my feelings, or anything. I don’t really even need an answer, to be honest. I just wanted you to know that I love you, okay?”

“Akira…” Ryuji managed to croak out, finally breaking eye contact and looking away, over at the bar, arms folding across his chest. “I...I dunno what to say…”

“That’s fine,” Akira assured him. “If you want to leave, I understand.”

“I…” Ryuji turned back to him, starting to refute him, but shook his head. “Yeah…” He stood up, and Akira stood up with him. “L-listen, I...don’t got an answer for you. I can’t say yes or no right now, alright? But…”

“It’s okay,” Akira replied, and Ryuji gave a bit, heaving sigh.

“It’s not okay,” Ryuji grumbled. “I wish I could just...gah!” He squared up and looked Akira in the eyes, a determined look on his face. “I just gotta have some time to think, okay? But I’ll be back tomorrow with everybody else. I’ll give you your answer then, alright?”

Akira gave him a sad smile. _He may never get his answer, then._

“Alright,” he agreed.

* * *

The next time he saw Ryuji was a month and a half later. Amidst the tearful and happy reunion with all of his friends, and hearing them explaining how they’d all worked so hard to get his first conviction overturned, he couldn’t help stealing glances at the blonde. But Ryuji didn’t look any different from before - he was the same, cheerful guy he’d always been.

 

>> Hey man, are you free? Can I come over? I got something to talk to you about

>You know it’s Valentines Day, right?

>>It’s important.

>Sure, I’m free.

>>Sure u don’t have 1 of the girls w/ u? Lol.

>Just shut up and get over here already.

 

“So, Ann told me that you and Futaba worked the hardest out of everyone to get me out,” Akira casually said, by way of greeting, when Ryuji stepped through the doors of Leblanc. Ryuji sputtered.

“I worked as hard as everybody else!” he protested, even as he sat down. Akira put a mug of hot chocolate in front of him, and he wrapped his cold hands around it, humming appreciatively.

“Uh, so...how was prison? They...treated you alright, didn’t they?” he asked.

“It was better than when I was captured before,” Akira assured him. “Sae-san made sure of that. It was mostly just boring. I did a lot of reading...a lot of thinking.”

“Yeah...I did a lotta thinkin' too,” Ryuji said, halfway muttered. Akira once again rounded the bar and motioned to a booth, and they both sat down. Ryuji grinned.

“Are you gonna chug the coffee again, like on Christmas Eve?” he joked.

“Nah,” Akira replied, smiling down at the mug a little nervously. He’d been trying not to think about his confession from that night, but it was impossible not to draw comparisons. Ryuji gave a long sigh. 

“Dude, that happened a month and a half ago and I’m still really pissed at you,” Ryuji said. Akira looked up at him, alarmed. “I mean, you just let me tell you that I’d give you an answer the next day and walk out, fully damn well knowing that you’d be going to prison. What the hell, man?”

“If I’d told you, you would’ve tried to stop me,” Akira pointed out. Ryuji frowned, but didn’t protest. “The whole point was that I was trying to keep all of your identities a secret, so you’d be safe.”

“I know,” Ryuji deflated. “It was still a shitty thing to do.”

“Yeah…” Akira said. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry, man, I forgave you a while ago,” Ryuji said. Then he reached down and picked up his mug of hot chocolate... and he chugged it. Akira stared at him in shock.

“Ah, god, that was  _ hot _ ,” he whined as he put the mug down. He looked up at Akira with a cheeky grin. “I love you too.”

“...oh,” Akira replied, dumbly. He blinked a few times, before it really hit him what had just happened. He felt his face heating up against his own will. “Oh!”

“It’s okay if you, like, changed your mind in prison or something. I mean, I have no damn clue why you’d have feelings for  _ me _ out of everybody in the first place,” Ryuji continued. He broke eye contact with Akira, staring down at his empty mug and looking...shy, almost. “To be honest, I knew I loved you back right away, but I was too scared that it was gonna change things between us, so that’s why I wanted more time. I was gonna tell you that at the Christmas party but, y’know,  _ some _ self-sacrificing  _ idiot _ had to go and get himself thrown in jail…”

“Sorry,” Akira apologized, breathless. 

“Hey, it takes an idiot to know an idiot, yeah?” Ryuji asked, with a laugh. “And I’m still real damn scared of what’s gonna change and what you’re gonna say, but I said my piece. I love you, Akira.”

“I had a lot to think about in prison,” Akira started, nearly having to force his throat to work, it was so tight. “But my feelings haven’t changed. They probably got stronger, in fact. I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, man. We all did,” Ryuji answered. He stood up, and Akira nearly bolted to his feet, letting Ryuji gather him up in a big, warm hug. “Welcome home, dude.” They stayed in the hug for a while, Akira basking in the warmth and the feeling of being held tight by Ryuji’s strong arms, toned from months of swinging baseball bats in the Metaverse. 

“So, uh,” Ryuji started, when they finally separated. He was a little pink, which was adorable. “Will you be my boyfriend?”

“Only if you’ll be  _ my _ boyfriend,” Akira answered, smirking. Ryuji rolled his eyes.

“Are you always gonna be this cheesy?” he asked.

“Oh, absolutely,” Akira confirmed. He reached out and put his hands on Ryuji’s shoulders, stepping closer to him and leaning in toward him. “Hey, is it okay if I kiss you?”

“S-sure!” Ryuji stammered, going completely still. Akira smiled, and closed the distance, pressing a light, teasingly short kiss on his lips before pulling away. Ryuji pouted. “Dude, you gotta give me more than that.” Akira smirked, and leaned back in for a much longer kiss. 


End file.
